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No Clear Winner When Deer Takes on Audi

Really, there's no problem in Avon Lake. At least the deer don't think so.

It was bound to happen.

You write enough articles about the deer problem in Avon Lake, you know…deer colliding with residents’ vehicles, eating well-tended gardens, getting hit by patrol cars and destroying the Metro Park, and eventually you become part of the story.

And so it happened.

Two Sundays ago I was driving westbound on Electric Boulevard into a fading sun, minding my own business. I was coming back from Giant Eagle so that the guy I left in the kitchen could finish cooking for me (side note: I don’t cook, he offered, who am I to say no?). The road ahead was clear.

I wasn’t speeding, talking on my phone, texting, putting on mascara or any of that nonsense.

Mostly because I retired my spiffy old Sebring convertible and replaced it with a spiffier electric-blue Audi TT convertible that is so small, even I can see over it.

The TT is a stick shift, so I need both hands available (and both feet for that matter) when driving. Paying attention with two hands and two eyes is kind of imperative. Which is why when I heard a “thump-thump,” I knew I hadn’t hit anything with the car. Still, it was a pretty solid “thump-thump."

I gave a quick look in the rear view expecting to see maybe a box that had blown under the car, but what I saw was a medium-sized deer floundering in the road behind me, and a white car pulled over on the other side of Electric.  

I then did what most people would do and said those magic words: “&%!#$*!”

Not just because I felt bad for the deer (I did, it was pathetic, but it eventually got up and hobbled into the woods), but because I knew a car that small wasn't going to escape a collision unscathed.

What I wasn’t expecting when I got out to check the damage, was a scolding from the woman in the white car.

“You didn’t slow down!," she yelled. “I flashed my lights at you! Now it’s going to DIE.”

Like I hit it on purpose. I don't even eat meat.

Note: When one is driving into sun glare, it’s kind of hard to notice another driver flashing one's beams. The deer coming out of the woods didn’t see the flashing beams either because IT RAN INTO ME.

Ok, it actually ran into the car. The back of the car specifically, cracking the car’s right tail light.  

I drove the two streets back home thankful the consequences weren’t worse. I’ve had at least a dozen near misses in the past two years and had I hit this deer (a deer that clearly needs Safety Town) head on in a pint-sized car, I might not be here to write about getting yelled at on Electric Boulevard.

Maybe it was luck, maybe it was timing. Of course, had I been going a little faster (I was doing a max of 25, because there are, ahem, a lot of deer out at sunset) the Audi-charging deer might have avoided me altogether.

Or worse yet I could have ended up as an Internet sensation like the  skateboard-charging deer (yes, this is that video, attached.)

But I didn't hit it, and there you have it. I called it in to the police, notifying them of the collision, and am now part of the deer-strike statistics.

So with rutting season around the corner, and no clear solution to the deer problem that may or may not exist in Avon Lake, I’m here to tell you what you already know: Keep it slow, stay alert, keep your eyes peeled and make sure you’re paying attention on Avon Lake roads.

Not that it did me any good. Now someone let the deer know to slow down and look both ways before crossing.

T October 03, 2012 at 08:04 PM
She should have yelled at the deer for damaging such a pretty car.
MZ October 03, 2012 at 08:49 PM
There hasn’t been a single day in over a month that I haven’t seen a deer, and more often than not they are running across a street in groups. I actually think the deer may have started a gang. They are out to get us. They travel in packs and openly flaunt the law. They trespass on my property and rarely leave when I ask them to. They have no problem damaging the landscaping around my house and one was recently spotted standing on my front porch. I think he was trying to break into my house. This is getting serious. The deer gangs must be stopped
Bill Conners October 03, 2012 at 09:16 PM
Lori, Welcome to the club. Mine was September 27th, 2007 in North Royalton who have just as many deer. Watched as Bambi took out drivers door glass part of front left drivers fender and rear drivers door. and it was either me or a guy in a nice 74 Vette behind me and i told him glad it was my Accord and not your fine machine. They bolt out so fast you just don't have time to react, so that woman who yelled at you was crazy. I have excellent peripheral vision and didn't see it till she was starting across the road. I grew up in rural PA and this is why we have hunting season to prevent the out of control deer population like this area has. Glad you are ok.
Kathy October 04, 2012 at 11:42 AM
I feel your pain....my deer 'experience' was in April 2010 on Walker Road...

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